sketch 009

people reading and sleeping on the subway.

happy thanksgiving, everybody!

blue monday 001

i'm a leo.  that's my mood.

i've numbered the title of this entry because i'm sure i'll have others.

nothing to write about today, but, just for fun, i thought i'd pile on the bandwagon with tasteless celebrity humor.

knock knock.
who's there?

little boy blue.
little boy blue who?

michael jackson!

hey, it made me laugh...

sketch 008

i recently realized that i don't know how to draw hair believably on my cartoon characters, so i have been doing some studies.

dial-a-ballad

due to a police investigation at jay street, i came in to work later than usual today.  thus, i wasn't really surprised by the red light on my phone.  mornings are generally my busiest time.

"you have.  one.  new message," the synthesized female voice informed me, ever-so cheerily.  "from an unknown number.  received.  yesterday.  at.  seven, oh, nine.  pee em."

good, i thought to myself, so no one has come around looking for me, yet.

"five minutes," the voicemail lady added.

a five-minute message?  very odd.  i pressed '2' to play.

after a muffled click, the instrumental bridge preceding the final key change in celine dion's power ballad "my heart will go on" began to play.  assuming that someone's voice would come in to let me know the purpose of this message, i continued to listen.

the only voice i heard was celine's.

you're here
there's nothing i fear
and i know that my heart will go on

we'll stay
forever this way...

the song continued to play, every so often dropping out due to what i can only assume was a temporary break in the caller's signal.  eventually, the song ended and immediately went into carly simon's "let the river run."

now, this voicemail could have easily been a completely random event.  cellphones act kooky all the time.  in fact, i had received a voicemail like this once before, when my sister's phone had re-dialed my work number and relayed a five-minute snippet of a taxi-cab conversation as heard through the lining of her purse.  another time, my high school friend alex somehow managed to call my home number while he was sitting on a friend's couch, his cellphone in his back pocket.  we later joked about his ass' dialing skills.

it's asking for the taking
trembling, shaking
oh, my heart is aching

as carly continued to warble, i became more nervous.  two of my ex-boyfriends have exhibited stalkerish behavior — three, if you count the guy i briefly dated this year who made a regular habit of standing outside madonna's apartment building.  listening to these lyrics, and those of the celine song, i had to wonder — is this yet another twisted way of stalker ex-boyfriend #2 letting me know that he's still thinking about me?  considering that he'd mailed me a cheesy halloween card in an envelope with no return address in october of 2001, during the height of the post-9/11 anthrax scare, i would not put this past him.

obviously, i have no evidence that he has anything to do with this little bit of strangeness.  i have no phone records, no caller id — hell, once i'd played the message twice, to be sure i didn't miss anything, i erased the damn thing so as not to think about it.  (i was unsuccessful in this regard, evidently.)  to be quite honest, i don't feel that i'm in any real danger.  as i said before, some anonymous person's buttcheeks could be the mystery culprit.

even so.  creepy.

thank god the my voicemail system cut off the message after the second verse of carly's song.  otherwise, who knows what other awful singers or sounds i would have had to endure?

"i'll never let go, jason!  i'll never let go..."

the amendment song

in the wake of yesterday's historic massachusetts supreme court decision on gay marriage, there has been a lot of talk about ratifying an amendment, both on the state level and nationally, proscribing gay marriage or any equivalent thereof.  in the process, i actually surprised myself by quoting from an episode from season seven of the simpsons, "the day the violence died."  while the song itself is about flag-burning and not gay marriage, the sentiment is extremely appropriate.

BART and LISA are watching the krusty the clown show on television.  for the cartoon segment, instead of itchy and scratchy, the following cartoon, eerily reminiscent of school house rock, comes on.

BOY:
hey, who left all this garbage on the steps of congress?

AMENDMENT:
i'm not garbage.

(singing)
I'M AN AMENDMENT TO BE
YES, AN AMENDMENT TO BE
AND I'M HOPING THAT THEY'LL RATIFY ME

THERE'S A LOT OF FLAG BURNERS
WHO HAVE GOT TOO MUCH FREEDOM
I WANNA MAKE IT LEGAL FOR POLICEMAN TO BEAT 'EM

'CAUSE THERE ARE LIMITS TO OUR LIBERTIES
AT LEAST I HOPE AND PRAY THAT THERE ARE
BECAUSE THOSE LIBERAL FREAKS GO TOO FAR!

BOY:
but why can't we just make a law against flag-burning?

AMENDMENT:
because that law would be unconstitutional.
but if we changed the constitution...

BOY:
then we could make all sorts of crazy laws!

AMENDMENT:
now you're catchin' on!

back to BART and LISA

BART:
what the hell is this?

LISA:
it's one of those campy 70's throwbacks that appeals to generation x'ers!

BART:
we need another vietnam to thin out their ranks a little.

back to the television

BOY:
what if people say you're not good enough to be in the constitution?

AMENDMENT:
(singing)
THEN I'LL CRUSH ALL OPPOSITION TO ME
AND I'LL MAKE TED KENNEDY PAY
IF HE FIGHTS BACK, I'LL SAY THAT HE'S GAY!

SENATOR:
good news, amendment!  they ratified ya.
you're in the u.s. constitution!

AMENDMENT:
oh, yeah!

pain.  don't.  hurt.

on saturday night, i went to see road house: the stage version of the cinema classic that starred patrick swayze, except this one stars taimak from the 80s cult classic the last dragon wearing a blonde mullet wig.  yes, that is its full title, which tells you pretty much everything you need to know about the play.  however, the actual experience of seeing the show, with its over-the-top performances, hilarious choreography and stunt-work, and amazing on-stage energy, was really the highlight of my weekend. 

nytheatre.com has a good review and an interview with the director, timothy haskell.

the show is in the la tea theatre of the clemente soto velez cultural center, down on suffolk street between rivington and delancey.  if you're in the area, definitely check it out before it closes.

déjà vu all over again!

last night, alone in the theater, lit by the eerie, greenish glow of the closing credits, i sat contemplating the horror of what i had just seen.

perhaps it's true, i thought.  maybe everything that has a beginning does have an end.  yet the wachowski brothers, through their super-special effects and convoluted storyline, seem to imply that the universe is the one big exception, that which has neither!  can this be right?

the most popular scientific theory is that the big bang signaled the beginning of the universe.  however, some physicists believe that the big bang was merely just one point along a cycle of expansion, collapse, and re-expansion; our big bang was merely one among many.  (to paraphrase pinky and the brain:  wash, rinse, repeat endlessly.) 

other physicists believe that the big bang was a random event, caused by the collision of parallel universes.  in this model, such collisions may not be an uncommon occurrence, and our big bang was not the first or the last.

in hinduism, brahma, seated on a lotus sprung from the navel of vishnu, creates the universe, which lasts only for the duration of his lifetime, 100 of his years.  the world, our planet, exists for only one of his days, which is equivalent to 4,320,000,000 earth years.  at the end of his day, the world is consumed by fire.  brahma then sleeps and awakes the next day to create a new world.  eventually, even brahma dies for 100 years only to be reborn and start the entire process anew.

is the entirety of history, time and existence nothing more than an infinite loop of repeating patterns consisting of a never-ending series of cycles (the circle of life, the wheel of fortune)?

if so, then who can say how many times i've seen this crappy movie, how many times i've written this stupid essay, and how many times you've visited this crummy website?

at the very least, i'm glad that i only spent $6.50 for this movie and hope the next version of me will have the same wisdom in the next turn on this merry-go-round.

i mean, really — can you imagine paying $10 to watch keanu reeves doing the impossible — making such atrocious dialogue unbelievably worse?

the mind boggles.

suits 201b pencils

re-vamping the first page of my comic book...again.  i know, some people insist that i should move on, but i honestly believe this makes for better story-telling.  i just wish i had more time to spend on finishing this up.

i'm committed to having the entire first page done by next week — inks, backgrounds, and lettering, all of it — and all eight pages by the end of the year.  wish me luck!

weekend highlights

friday

dinner at nana's (155 5th avenue in brooklyn) with joe, phil (joe's friend), ivan (phil's boyfriend) and john (phil's old college roommate and current mtv news anchor).  my efforts to remain calm interfere with my ability to concentrate on the menu.  i desperately appeal to joe for suggestions.

at the last minute, i order the miso tuna, only to discover when the meal arrives that john has already ordered the same entrée.  over dinner, while learning about courtney love's personal troubles, i worry that my food selection will be taken as a transparent attempt to ingratiate myself.  the miso tuna turns out to be quite delicious.

phil and ivan then drive us to their house upstate.  for two hours, any and all anxiety i have about passing gas in a confined space is compounded by the fact that i am sitting next to someone whom i have seen on television on a regular basis.

saturday

lunch at coyote café.  a teenage girl at the table across from ours instantly recognizes john.  her reaction gives voice to my own muted disbelief at the entire situation — she unknowingly freaks out for the both of us. 

i order the california cobb salad, which is roundly criticized by the resident vegetarian for being 50% animal or animal by-product.  the meal itself, drinks and all, comes to represent the totality of american excess.  i guiltily consume only half of meal, offering up the rest as some kind of penance.

afterwards, phil, john, joe and i go to see elf, starring will farrell.  still hungry from lunch, i am prepared not to like this movie.  joe surprises me with a bag of peanut m&m's, which i munch greedily.  the film turns out to be quite entertaining and teaches me that singing loudly is the best way to spread christmas cheer.

back at the house, we eat homemade turkey lasagna, field greens salad with balsamic vinaigrette and toasted sesame seed dressing, rotini in a blue cheese alfredo sauce with walnuts, and an amazing pecan pie for dessert.  later on, we watch the lunar eclipse and andy roddick hosting saturday night live.  i learn that mandy moore's boyfriend is indeed a hottie and that "see you next tuesday" is a euphemism for a fairly nasty four-letter word.

sunday

over breakfast, i am told that one major problem (among many) with our country's post-war occupation of iraq is that our current administration is unwilling to build a truly international peace-keeping coalition.  these facts are explained to me via random outbursts by a half-naked man in the den.  i quietly finish my half-bagel with cream cheese.

on the drive home, i discover, much to my surprise, that i am far more of a skank than mariah carey (for all her hoochie-mama outfits and on-screen antics) actually is.  also, in a moment of confusion, my sarcastic praise of paul mccartney's lyrics are mistaken for sincere appreciation — which is understandable given my questionable taste in music.  i implement a cookie-consumption strategy to avoid further embarassment.

back in the safety of my apartment, joe and i set off my smoke alarm while using my broiler to make turkey cheeseburgers for dinner.  i finally figure out how to disconnect the damn thing.

overall, an educational weekend.  pictures posted here.

deep and mysterious lyrics

ooh yeah
chicago

if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me to life
if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me
sentence me to life

some might say i'm guilty of love in the first degree
if the jury wants to lock me up and throw away the key
there's no greater punishment than what i face inside
won't tamper with the evidence cause there's nothing to hide

he lives inside my heart
i'm in the middle too
you never had a clue
unless you felt it too

if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me to life
if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me
sentence me to life

swear tell the truth, just let me plead my case
the thief who stole my heart from me i couldn't let escape
he's my only alibi, but i won't drop a dime
so how can i give up to you, my partner in crime

he lives inside my heart
i'm in the middle too
you never had a clue
unless you felt it too

if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me to life
if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me
sentence me to life

you can take away my freedom
but you can't take my love from me
i won't die a lonely prisoner
'cause my heart will set me free
ooh ooh yeah
whoo!
chicago

i said
if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me to life
if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me
sentence me to life

ah, come on
i said
if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me to life
if love is a crime, baby
i'd do my time
whether it's wrong or right
you can sentence me
sentence me to life

i said love is a crime

24

i watched the first two episodes of the third season of 24 on FOX last night.  (enough numbers in there for ya?)

on the plus side, kiefer sutherland is still a total hottie, and they've even brought in a younger, just-as-cute sidekick, too, played by james badge dale.  d.b. woodside is also in the cast as the president's (dennis haysbert's) brother and chief of staff.  cuties galore!

on the minus side, the main character's daughter, kim, has returned.  i suppose making her a self-sufficient central character is better than having her run from peril to peril, but damn if that girl doesn't still get on my nerves.  (no offense, miss cuthbert.)  in my not-so-humble opinion, they should have brought back sherry palmer (played by the kick-ass penny johnson) instead.  (and we never did find out what happened to michelle forbes' character last season!)

this show has been very well done ever since its first episode, but i'm not sure if i can handle another nail-biting season of near-death experiences and serial cliffhangers.  i can watch the united states come to the brink of destruction to be saved at the last possible second by the implausible feats of jack bauer only so many times!  (i have a sensitive constitution!)

however, after all is said and done, i will probably tune in anyway because i'm a sucker for the "what happens next?" format, in any medium.  lastly, let us not forget, kiefer sutherland is still a total hottie.

sketch 007

studies for suzy.